A divorce is one of the most difficult transitions in an individual’s life. Some define it as being worse than death since it has no closure. There are other issues of child custody, dividing assets, and the actual act of separating from someone you have probably spent decades with. The whole process is emotionally draining and requires objectivity and sound advice from a professional. If you seek a legal advisor for divorce, Jimeno & Gray, P.A. have qualified divorce lawyers to help you walk the journey.
Below we explore the 10 most common divorce mistakes you should avoid ensuring a smoother transition.
1. Failure To Separate Personal Property From Joint Property
Property acquired outside marriage is considered personal and should be treated so during a divorce proceeding. Many people fail to identify separate personal property during the divorce process, and such properties end up being distributed. Although divorce can take a toll on you, it’s good to ensure only property acquired jointly is distributed between you and your spouse and other parties enjoined as interested parties such as children. The rest should go to the rightful owner.
2. Taking Legal Advice From Other Sources Instead Of Your Attorney
It’s easier to take advice from people who have gone through divorce since they already have the experience. However, this should not be the case, even if the circumstances are similar. You should only take legal advice from your attorney. Your friends and loved ones may have gone through a divorce, but they may not know the exact details of your case. There could be slight changes or new clauses, for instance, on matrimonial laws and only an attorney is well versed with such developments. Only take legal advice from a qualified legal officer since they are well versed and up to date with the current state of affairs.
3. Rushing The Divorce Process
Divorce is one of the most painful events in anyone’s life. Many people find themselves rushing the process to avoid going through the pain of processing the events. The rushed process may force you to make rushed and emotional decisions that you may regret later. This includes marital settlement agreements such as property division, which keeps the children among other key decisions that have a significant effect on your future and that of everyone involved.
Do not use emotions to make these life-changing decisions. At this point, you are going through a loss and are very vulnerable. That’s where you require a professional to walk with you. This brings objectivity to the whole process since a professional can easily tell when you make a decision emotionally.
4. Not Getting A Financial Order
A decree absolute does not sever your financial ties with your ex-spouse. A financial order prevents your spouse from making future financial claims. Due to the technicality of the document, always ensure it is drafted by a specialist in this area of law. Remember to make changes to important documents such as wills, insurance policies, trusts, and other documents where you have listed beneficiaries. You can change your spouse’s name and put the appropriate beneficiary which could be children or your parents. If this change is not executed, it could lead to another legal battle in the future. This happens mostly when one of the spouses passes on. In this scenario, you may require to engage a trust and estate lawyer who will expound on the specific documents that need to be changed.
5. Not Disclosing Key Information
Ensure you disclose key information to your attorney as this makes it easier for them to plan the defense and handle your case. Be honest and provide accurate and complete information as falsified or undisclosed information may cost you in the long run.
6. Discussing Sensitive Information Online
Divorce is draining and you may be tempted to vent online to seek sympathy or out of frustration. Avoid discussing your divorce proceedings online as this information can be used against you. It may end up complicating the whole process since you could end up emotionally sharing information you could not have shared under normal circumstances.
Anything you post online could be used against you and that’s why it’s important to desist from sharing on social media until the divorce proceedings are over. For instance, you could post a new expensive purchase such as a car and this same car could be used to prove you are capable of paying for alimony or child support. The best option is to desist from posting on social media. Your friends and family members should also desist since they can easily sabotage your efforts. Whatever they post could be used as evidence against you in court and could end up costing you. If a loved one wants to support you, let them do it offline with no incriminating evidence.
7. Not Planning For Life After Divorce
Working with a financial advisor during this process can be a lifeline. It helps you get clarity on the future and helps you create solid financial goals. If you have not been working, this may be the time to look for a job. You may also be forced to sell some assets to cushion yourself especially if you have been depending on your spouse’s income and they are not legally required to support you.
8. Not Considering Other Alternatives To Litigation
A divorce process can be meditated out of courts and this helps avoid the messy nature that is most divorces. In a mediation process, couples meet with a neutral mediator for some sessions in a process where they work out divorce terms. Mediation is not only cheaper, it is fair and quicker and it also ensures children are protected leaving minimal damage. Mediation is considered a non-adversarial process where everyone’s best interests are put forward.
9. Agreeing To One-Sided Settlement
Due to the painful nature of a divorce, you may be tempted to make decisions just to spite your ex-spouse. The temptation is to accept, sign the documents, and end the process quickly to avoid the pain of facing reality. Do not accept one-sided agreements. Decisions you make at this point are final; that’s why they need to be made in a sober state.
The best approach is to view divorce as a process and not a one-off event. This enables you to consult widely, meticulously go through all the documents, seek clarification where you do not understand, and ensure everything is clarified before you sign the legal documents. Remember this is a permanent decision, and once you sign the divorce papers, there are things you will never be able to change going forth.
10. Making Verbal Agreements
Ensure all agreements are put in writing, as this protects your interests. Whether it’s in a mediation process or your relationship is still amicable, do not make verbal agreements as these could be ignored in the future. Verbal agreements lack solid evidence and could be difficult to prove if one of the spouses is not around. Witnesses to verbal agreements may also back off in the future.